After the breakup or divorce

1. Don’t Be Nervous

It’s inevitable that there will be some nervousness about having sex with a new partner after a divorce or breakup. But just because you are divorced does not mean you are a nun! You are single and free to do what you want. So you got to get out there and have the best experiences possible, however make sure you are safe and don't just grab the first few dicks that show up... unless thats what you are looking for.

Sex psychologist Denis Lin once wrote “remember that different people have sex differently. Be observant of your new partner’s likes and dislikes, and communicate your likes and dislikes to him. Enjoy the new experience and have fun.” The best way to overcome any nervousness you may have is to be prepared.

2. There Is No Need To Be Self-Conscious About Your Body

Just because you have not have been naked in front of a different guy since you met your ex, does not mean that you have to be self-conscious about your body. Here’s why…

This new guy is going to be just as self conscious as you!

He’ll be wondering:

I hope she likes my body
I hope I don’t cum too quickly (premature ejaculation)
I hope I can actually get it up
I hope she doesn’t think my penis is small
I hope she likes my ‘moves’
Most likely, he will be too concerned about himself and his own performance to spend much time judging you!

And besides, your the women take control. You can talk dirty, wear sexy lingerie or even try having sex with your clothes on if you are feeling particularly self-conscious!

The truth is that if a guy is into you with your clothes on then he will definitely be into you with your clothes off!

Your clothes are not magic, god-like garments from a fairy tale that make you look like a completely different person.

I know that you may be nervous about being naked in front of someone new, especially if you are a mom, but you really have nothing to worry about.



3. Masturbate. Yes, That’s Right…Masturbate!

Before you become a man-pleasing sex goddess, it’s important to know a little about your own body too.
That way you will know what you are prepared and not prepared to do for your new sex partner in advance. The best way to achieve this, if it’s not something you are regularly doing already, is to masturbate and fantasize, plus some me time might curb some desire so your a bit more picky. After the breakup is agood time to order those toys you always wanted and try them out. Where you afraid of hurting his ego with the 10" Greek God Of Thickness Dildo? Go ahead girl get it now!

You can think of masturbation as sex training. Try out new vibrators and dildos of different sizes and shapes. Try anal plugs or even clitoral stimulators. This will be a great way for you to use your body in new ways before you try it out for real.

But no amount of masturbation will equal the real deal so make sure not get on out there! By the way, if you are looking for tips on how to masturbate properly and have incredible orgasms, you may want to check out our masturbation articles.



4. Check Out The Gym

No need to go overboard in the gym! But getting toned is going to help. A lot.
After your breakup you will want to show the world that you are back out there, that you are an independent and sexual woman who wants and deserves a sexy guy. One of the best ways to show off your independence and intent and to bag the best guy around is to hit the gym.

I know I can sometimes sound like I make excuses formen and this may be one of those times…but the fact is guys are turned on visually. That is a fact that unfortunately we can’t argue with. But just looking physically fit is not the only benefit of working out. You will also feel healthier and have more energy too.

Plus it may not hurt to improve on your stamina and fitness too because positions.

5. Don’t Rush In

Don’t mistake your sexual urges and desires for the urge to start a new relationship.
Post breakup or divorce you are a free woman. It’s a big world full of potential partners, many of whom will make for some great sex. Firstly though, make sure you are comfortable with putting yourself out there as you will be more relaxed and better able to enjoy yourself while pleasuring your new partner.

Another fact that you need to consider is that rushing into sex with a new partner also leaves you vulnerable to the powerful force of oxytocin which is released into the brain after orgasm. This hormone is also called the ‘cuddle hormone’ and is responsible for you feeling so attached to someone after sex. This can lead you to make bad decisions about choosing a partner or staying with a guy that is really not compatible with you.



6. Be Protected

It sounds like common sense now but it is something that could easily slip your mind if it’s not something you are used to thinking about. Don’t forget to use a condom when having sex with a new partner.

You may have become used to not having to use them when you were in your long term relationship and you may even be on birth control but it is still best practice to be safe and carry a condom.

Your potential partner will really appreciate it if he is caught without one so it makes sense for you to carry your own ones, and if you think thee might be a suprise fun night make sure you carry several sizes, to big or to small is just as bad as not having any at all with you.

Some women also like the comfort of knowing their partner is using strong ones and like the delaying effect they have on their partners orgasm so its not just for his pleasure that you are carrying them. Bring condoms that suit you and your needs.

So that’s what my friend and I came up with. That and don’t even think about sleeping with your ex ever again. That is always a bad idea. There are plenty of dicks in the sea and there is no point settling for a minnow when you could have a massive marlin. Peace.